Script VO
Season 1 episode 20
Between a Sign and a Hard Place
KELLY’S HOUSE
Kelly gets Silver and Sammy ready for school.
KELLY: Okay, Silver, hurry up and finish that geometry homework. Sammy, I need you to turn off SpongeBob and drink your juice.
SAMMY: I don't like it. It has bugs.
KELLY: What?!
SILVER: Those aren't bugs, that's pulp.
KELLY: Okay, uh, time check?
DONNA: Uh, 8:18.
KELLY: Oh, Sammy's lunch.
DONNA: Oh, I got it. Already made. A turkey sandwich, granola bar, and a sticker that says "I love you."
SAMY: Mommy, I drunk the bugs.
KELLY: Oh, you're the best. I love you. Okay. Donna, can you?
DONNA: Yup, taking him to the car. Come on, Sammy. Come on, buddy.
Silver hands Kelly her homework.
SILVER: All right, here you go. Geometry homework. That last problem set was a killer. If you get inspired, feel free to take a hack at the tetrahedron.
KELLY: Nice try. Pretty soon, you'll be handing in your homework yourself. You think you're going to be ready to go back to school next week?
SILVER: Sure. I guess. Bye.
KELLY: Bye.
WILSONS HOUSE
HARRY: Hey, you sure you want to sell this stuff? I mean, honestly, Deb, there are some real treasures in here. Big Mouth Billy Bass. No, we cannot sell Big Mouth Billy Bass.
DEBBIE: Let's hope we can.
HARRY: Come on. We'll put a pin in it.
DEBBIE: We will not put a pin in it. We will put a price tag on ill it; it's junk, Harry.
HARRY: Oh, if it's junk, then why are we trying to sell it?
DEBBIE: Ah and therein lies the paradox of the yard sale. Hand me the singing fish, my love.
HARRY: Hey, Annie. You shouldn't have.
ANNIE: Yeah, well, I didn't. It's for Naomi. She's giving me a ride to school. I just wanted to say bye.
DEBBIE: Wow. You guys are really making a go of this whole friendship thing, huh?
ANNIE: Yup. I have decided that I want to be a girls' girl. I don't know if you noticed, but I didn't have many girlfriends back in Kansas. And I was finally starting to make some here, and then I just got lost in having a boyfriend. So now…
DEBBIE: You're ready to be a girls' girl. Bring on the Barbie dolls.
ANNIE: Hey! Bye, Mom.
DEBBIE: Have fun.
NAOMI: Oh, my God, who left all that junk in your front yard? Seriously, you should file a police report.
ANNIE: No, no, it's, um, we finally sold our house in Kansas, and we got all this stuff to get rid of. So, uh, we're having a yard sale.
NAOMI: Gross…ly awesome!
ANNIE: Um, here. Oh It It's fine. Uh, go ahead. Keep putting on your lipstick.
NAOMI: You made me coffee?
ANNIE: Yeah, it's a pretty color on you. It was really no problem.
NAOMI: Sweet pea goes good with my eyes. Oh! Is that a foosball table?
ANNIE: Yeah, I used to be really big into foosball.
NAOMI: Seriously? Me, too! I used to play all the time with Bella Cruise. I swear, I was, like, the foosball champ of St. Barts.
ANNIE: We'll have to play.
NAOMI: I'd love to.
ANNIE: I hope it's not cold.
NAOMI: It's perfect. I don't like my coffee too hot anyway.
WEST BEVERLY
LIAM: Hey, what's the rush?
ETHAN: Oh. Hey, Liam.
LIAM: Where you going, White Rabbit?
ETHAN: Uh, to, to class. I've got English.
LIAM: Oh, yeah? You want to be an English teacher?
ETHAN: Teach?
LIAM: Well, yeah. I mean, say you go to class, maybe you get really into it, right? Then what? You head to college, and become an English major. Okay. And then? You graduate with a useless degree that only qualifies you to teach English at some lame high school to snot-nosed kids who'd rather be at the beach.
ETHAN: What are you saying?
LIAM: I'm saying, let's go the beach.
Naomi arrives.
NAOMI: Liam! Quelle surprise.
LIAM: Hi-ya, Naomi.
NAOMI: Did I overhear you trying to get Ethan to cut? Because he won't, so stop trying to corrupt him.
ETHAN: Naomi…
NAOMI: Don't worry, I got this.
ETHAN: No, I got this. Sure, man. Let's go to the beach.
LIAM: Cool. See ya, Naomi.
NAOMI: Well, I'm not going with you two, so don't bother asking.
WEST BEVERLY’S CAFETERIA
NAVID: So what time do we have to go to your lawyer's? Oh-ho-ho, no fries for you.
ADRIANNA: Come on, fries are a vegetable. And I said I'd be there at 4:00, but, um mmm, but you don't have to come.
NAVID: I know I don't have to if I don't want to. But hey, here, I brought you some real vegetables: kale.
ADRIANNA: Mmm, it's really not going to be that exciting. I just have to pick up a lot of brochures and kale, really?
NAVID: Yeah, vitamin A helps support the fetal immune functions. And, no, I don't want excitement, but, you know, I want to, you know, lend moral support if and when it's needed.
ADRIANNA: Okay, sounds good. Um, do I really have to eat this?
NAVID: Loaded with vitamin C, which helps the baby build strong bones and teeth.
ADRIANNA: That's it. I am confiscating that pregnancy book you're reading.
NAVID: Sorry, it's already committed to memory. Hey, did you take your prenatal vitamins?
ADRIANNA: Yes, Navid.
NAVID: Am I driving you crazy?
ADRIANNA: Yes, Navid.
NAVID: Okay, you know what? Eat your kale.
REALTOR
REALTOR: And what type of property are you looking for?
DONNA: It shouldn't feel too much like a retail space, more like an art gallery. Modern, lots of glass, clean lines. Um, high ceilings, big windows Oh, and a private office space upstairs. What else?
REALTOR: Uh "Else"?
DONNA: Oh, marble. It's got to have lots of marble. I love marble. And southern exposure, wooden accents Oh, and I want an antique wooden door with a brass doorknocker in the shape of a tiger's head. Do you know any places like that?
REALTOR: Not on the entire planet. But I'll check the computer. Boy, you sure do know what you want for your store.
KELLY: Uh, let me ask you a question. Do you want to find a space to rent? Sure.
DONNA: I don't know what I want. I mean Japan was supposed to be a really fun adventure, you know? And when David got offered a job, we were like, "Sure, why not live overseas for a year?" And then my designs took off and he got promoted and everything just seemed unmei. "Meant to be." Then, one year turned into two years, that became three four and… Now, I just miss it here.
I want to come home. Especially now that I have Ruby. I want to raise her here where I have a support system. Near you.
KELLY: And David doesn't want to move back?
DONNA: We've been fighting about it for over a year. And the last couple of months things have just been pretty awful. And that's why we separated. So if I move back here, what What does that mean? Divorce?
KELLY: I don't know.
DONNA: Me neither. I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know.
* Opening credits *
WEST BEVERLY
Liam drops Ethan off at school and Ryan arrives.
ETHAN: Thanks, Liam.
RYAN: Ethan! Missed you in class today.
ETHAN: Oh, yeah, I wasn't feeling good, so a friend dropped me off at home. And now, I'm feeling better so picking up my car.
RYAN: Come on, man, cutting class? It's not you.
ETHAN: Appreciate the observation.
RYAN: What's going on with you, Ethan?
ETHAN: What's going on is I'm sick of being watched like a hawk. Big deal, I miss one class. It's not the end of the world.
RYAN: Yeah, nobody said it was the end of the world, but it's also not okay.
ETHAN: All right? And Liam's trouble, and you know that, so Are you going to give me detention or not?
RYAN: Yeah. I am.
ETHAN: Good to know.
PEACH PIT
Silver sits down at the Peach Pit.
GIRL 1: Oh, my God. What a freak.
GIRL 2: Oh, hello, Silver. Hey, I saw your movie on YouTube. Brilliant. Seriously. You're like a female Darren Aronofsky.
Silver leaves and she cruises Dixon.
DIXON: Planning on standing me up?
SILVER: They…
DIXON: What's wrong?
SILVER: They were talking about me. I can't go back to school. There's no way. Everyone's going to be laughing at me and whispering, Dixon…
DIXON: Sit down, sit down. All right, look, no, they won't. And if they do… So what? Who cares?
SILVER: I do.
DIXON: Fine. Then you know what? Don't let them know that. Just put on a smile and act like nothing happened.
SILVER: And when they ask what I've been up to for the last month?
DIXON: I don't know; um, tell them you've taken up gardening. Or, uh Tell them you've been reading Jane Austen. And then just smile. And dare them to give you any trouble. All right? Just never let them see you sweat. "You got to fake it till you make it."
SILVER: Any more platitudes?
DIXON: "Keep a stiff upper lip." And, uh, "turn the other cheek."
SILVER: Okay, that sounds kind of tricky. Keeping a stiff upper lip while turning the other cheek. But I'll try.
DIXON: Atta-girl.
WILSONS HOUSE
Debbie sees that Harry has marked up his items to ridiculous prices.
DEBBIE: A hundred and fifty dollars?! Harry, what on earth?
HARRY: Seems a fair price to me.
DEBBIE: Yeech, get that horrible thing off your head.
HARRY: What horrible thing? Me hair? You think me ginger hair is horrible?
DEBBIE: Stop. Harry, honestly, who's going to buy a Big Mouth Billy Bass for $150? Someone getting a very good bargain.
HARRY: Oh, you know, I forgot to tell you this. I heard the weirdest thing at the school board meeting.
DEBBIE: Could you take off the hat? It's really hard to take you seriously.
HARRY: Uh, apparently, Charles Clark is being sued for sexual harassment.
DEBBIE: What? Naomi's dad?
HARRY: Yeah. By Carole Ranson. Her daughter goes to West Bev. Portia Ranson.
DEBBIE: Whoa, poor Naomi.
ANNIE: "Poor Naomi" what?
HARRY: Uh, well Sweetheart, you're going to hear it anyway. Uh, it's probably best you hear it from me.
ANNIE: Dad, what?
HARRY: Naomi's dad is being sued for sexual harassment.
ANNIE: God. Poor Naomi.
DEBBIE: She's really going to need a friend now.
PSYCHIC
DONNA: I'm telling you, she is the crème de la crème de la crème.
KELLY: Okay, you're honestly telling me that you think this alleged psychic…
DONNA: Shhht.
KELLY: … Madame Flanagan is going to help you decide whether you should stay in L.A. or not?
DONNA: Come on, I know this seems kooky, but it's worth a shot. Madame Flanagan is very good. She's the one that told Angelina to adopt.
KELLY: Oh, my! That means nothing!
DONNA: Well she also predicted the return of high-waisted jeans. I'm serious, like, way back in 2006. Kel, jump on board. It's going to be fun.
WOMAN 1: Madame Flanagan will see you now.
FLANAGAN: Here or Japan?
DONNA: Right. So David's point is everything's going so well for us in Japan his career's thriving, my career's thriving so why rock the boat?
FLANAGAN: Why, indeed?
DONNA: Because I miss it here. And I want to raise my daughter here. But if I stay in L.A., I don't know how my marriage will survive. And if I move back to Japan, I'll be unhappy and I don't know if my marriage will survive but I want my marriage to survive, but I don't know. At what cost, do you know?
FLANAGAN: Has your right foot been bothering you? I'm getting a vision of a foot.
DONNA: My right foot? No.
FLANAGAN: Maybe that was for someone else. Anyway, it sounds like you have an important decision to make.
DONNA: Yes! Yes, I do!
FLANAGAN: I'm sensing skepticism from your friend.
DONNA: Oh, don't worry about her. Tell me what to do.
FLANAGAN: I'm afraid I can't do that. I will tell you this. Look for a sign.
DONNA: What kind of sign?
FLANAGAN: A sign of what to do.
KELLY, laughing: Sorry.
FLANAGAN: You I'm getting a vision of a man. You're going to meet a man.
KELLY: thanks for that, but, um, I'm really not looking for a man right now.
FLANAGAN: Looking or not, he's coming. A very handsome man with a six-pack.
KELLY: Uh, well that's good to know. Thanks a lot, Madame Flanagan. Uh, but Donna. Donna!
DONNA: Thanks.
YARD SALE
Debbie and Harry run their yard sale and Naomi arrives to meet Annie.
NAOMI: Hey, Principal Wilson.
HARRY: Hi.
NAOMI: Adorable fish. Is that one of your yard sale items?
HARRY: No, not really.
DEBBIE: Yes.
NAOMI: Hi, Ms. Wilson.
DEBBIE: Hi.
ANNIE: Hey.
NAOMI: You came.
ANNIE: Hi.
NAOMI: Yeah, I told you I'd swing by.
ANNIE: Cool. You want to play some foosball?
NAOMI: Sure.
The two head over to the foosball table.
ANNIE: So how are you doing?
NAOMI: Fine. This morning was a little rough. My manicurist wreaked havoc on my cuticles. It's fine, though. I totally keyed her car. Yes!
ANNIE: My parents are driving me crazy.
NAOMI: Oh, yeah?
ANNIE: Um, how's your dad, by the way?
NAOMI: Funny you should ask. He called me today. He wants to come by my hotel for a chat.
ANNIE: Oh, yeah?
NAOMI: Shot on goal!
ANNIE: You are good.
NAOMI: Yes, I am.
ANNIE: So, hey, if you want to, you know, call me later… You know, after your dad leaves.
NAOMI: Yeah, right. Sure. She shoots, she scores! Yay!
ADRIANNA’S HOUSE
Navid and Adrianna look over options for couples to adopt her baby.
NAVID: Dan and Kate have been married for three years.
ADRIANNA: Hey, five years or longer. Okay, Matt and Rachel have "a spacious house with a huge, grassy yard, but no one to play in it."
NAVID: Sad.
ADRIANNA: Psychologically manipulative, don't you think?
NAVID: Yeah.
ADRIANNA: I don't want my baby to grow up with psychologically manipulative people.
NAVID: I hear you. You want a nice, down-to-earth couple.
ADRIANNA: Yeah. Two people who are equal partners, with good communication.
NAVID: Who like to laugh and are warm and loving.
ADRIANNA: Mm-hmm, exactly. Is that too much to ask?
NAVID: No.
ADRIANNA: I just wish that kindergarten teacher Laura would break up with motorcycle-riding Jimmy, and hook up with animal-lover Josh who couldn't possibly be happy with plastic surgery Pam. Hoo-hoo.
NAVID: "Hoo-hoo" what?
ADRIANNA: That was a big kick.
NAVID: Yeah?
ADRIANNA: Do you want to feel?
NAVID: Yeah.
Navid feels the baby kick.
ADRIANNA: Feel that?
NAVID: Yeah.
ADRIANNA: That's a definite "no" for plastic surgery Pam.
NAVID: I read somewhere that the more active the baby, the more likely it's a boy.
That's an old wives' tale. Well, are you carrying high or low?
ADRIANNA: Navid.
NAVID: Well, high is supposed to be a girl and I think low is supposed to be…
ADRIANNA: Stop! I don't want to know the sex of the baby, okay? I don't even want the baby to even have a sex. I don't want to think of the baby being a real kid or a real person. Someone that I'm going to have to give up, okay?
NAVID: Okay.
ADRIANNA: Okay. All right. Victoria and Gabe.
STREET
Donna and Kelly walk down the street.
DONNA: Check it out. Another Japanese restaurant. That's got to be some sort of sign, right?
KELLY: I don't know. The last Japanese restaurant we saw had a stop sign in front of it, which could mean don't go back to Japan.
DONNA: You're right.
KELLY: I was being sarcastic.
DONNA: I was pretending not to notice. But wait, it's also raining in Beverly Hills, which it never does, so maybe that's a sign.
KELLY: Okay, Donna, uh, I hate to be rude, but Madame Flanagan? Come on! The woman saw a vision of a foot.
DONNA: Yeah, but she also saw a vision of you with a handsome, six-pack man. If she saw me with a man, then she is seeing way into the future. I mean, between taking care of Silver, and taking care of Sammy, and keeping up with my job…
DONNA: You've got to take care of yourself. You know how they always say, "Put your oxygen mask on first before you assist others."
KELLY: Okay, but a man is not an oxygen mask. I mean, he's going to have needs. He's going to want attention and time…
DONNA: No one's talking about a husband here. A husband is a beer belly. I'm talking about a hot, six-pack fling. You know what? We should get a sitter and go out tonight.
KELLY: Go where?
DONNA: Well, someplace fun, someplace cool, someplace we can both let off some steam.
KELLY: Okay, that sounds like fun.
DONNA: Let's do it.
KELLY: Oh, yay. Where would one go to blow off steam?
DONNA: Uh, how should I know? I live in Japan, remember? Um, oh, wait. Hi. Ooh, excuse me. Okay, this is a weird question, but we're looking for someplace to go out tonight. Do you have any suggestions?
GIRL 1: Oh, what do you think?
GIRL 2: On a Saturday night? Truck Stop's a good time.
DONNA: Oh, Truck Stop, here we come.
KELLY: Thank you!
HOTEL
NAOMI: What do you mean; I have to leave the hotel?
CHARLES: Well, for my image I need to be seen as a family man right now. See, I'm being sued.
NAOMI: Sued for what?
CHARLES: Well, Carole Ranson…
NAOMI: Oh, God, Portia's mom? Why would she be suing you?
CHARLES: Sh-She's claiming falsely that I sexually harassed her.
NAOMI: What?! Oh, my God, Dad, what's wrong with you?
CHARLES: I didn't do it. But I need us to present a unified front as a family. Plus, it's illegal for you to be living here on your own. And I'm going to be pretty scrutinized over the next few weeks, so I need you to come home with me.
NAOMI: Wait, so let me get this straight. I'm being punished because of your screw-up?
CHARLES: Just pack your things, Naomi.
NAOMI: No. You can't make me. I'll tell Gail about the real estate lady.
CHARLES: I already told her. And she's forgiven me. I will not pay for another night this hotel.
BAR
DONNA: Sorry. Ooh, fun cocktails. I'll order for us. Excuse me.
WOMAN 1: What can I get you?
DONNA: Can we get two Dirty Girl Scouts, please? They have California rolls here. Do you think maybe that's a sign I should split my time between… Okay. You're right. No more obsessing over signs. We'll just obsess over the fling that you're going to have.
KELLY: Okay, what do you want me to do? Find some cute guy and ask him to lift up his shirt so I can see his abs?
DONNA: No. You don't ask. Wait, actually, there's not that many guys here.
KELLY: Uh, you know what? You're kind of right. Uh, Donna? Um, do you think we are at a l-lesbian bar?
DONNA: No. It's just L.A. (Seeing a lesbian couple). Oh, my God, we're totally at a lesbian bar!
KELLY: Yeah.
DONNA: How could those girls send us to a lesbian bar?
KELLY: I don't know. Oh it's 'cause we had our arms around each other.
WOMAN 1: Two dirty Girl Scouts.
DONNA: Cheers. You want to dance?
KELLY: Uh, only if you've got a six-pack.
DONNA: Well, to find that out, you're gonna have to get me a lot drunker.
KELLY: Come on.
HOTEL BAR
NAOMI: Oh, hey, Liam.
LIAM: Oh. Hey, Naomi.
Liam blows her off. Naomi then meets with Annie and seats at her table.
NAOMI: What is up with him? He acts like we haven't been screwing like rabbits for the past week and a half. Did I tell you I ran into him at Shang Hau? We went in the bathroom and…
ANNIE: Oh. Enough.
NAOMI: Agreed. It is enough already. Seriously. I mean, he's, like, hot, and then he's cold, and then he's really hot again. Whatever, I'm over it, seriously. I don't want to be some booty call.
I'm not the type of girl you run into at a Chinese restaurant and take into a bathroom. Anymore. I have much more self-respect than that.
ANNIE: Well, right on, sister! Thank you. So, how was your dad?
NAOMI: Uh, fine. Mm, same old loser. God, these are really good fries. Like, crazy delicious good.
ANNIE: Yep, they are good.
PORTIA: Your dad's a disgusting pervert. I hope my mother takes him for all he's worth.
ANNIE: How dare you! You can't blame Naomi for something that her dad did o-or didn't do.
PORTIA: Oh, please, the guy's a scumbag.
NAOMI: You knew? You knew about my dad?
ANNIE: I I-I just heard yesterday.
NAOMI: So you knew today at the yard sale.
ANNIE: I-I am sorry.
NAOMI: I, I can't believe people are talking about my dad, about me, and you didn't even say anything. Some friend.
BAR
Kelly and Donna are dancing.
KELLY: Okay, wait, we seriously have to go now.
WOMAN 1: No, no, no.
DONNA: No. We'll totally be back.
WOMAN 2: Promise?
DONNA: Yeah.
WOMAN 1: Promise?
DONNA: Of course this is just what we needed. Come on, let's go.
KELLY: Okay, have another dirty Girl Scout for me.
WOMAN 1: Okay, be careful.
Donna and Kelly walk on the street.
DONNA: I'm just saying that Alyssa was definitely into you.
KELLY: Oh, are you jealous?
DONNA: Of course you came with me. If I'd known you were gonna be such a fickle date, I would have…
Donna then sees an empty space for lease.
KELLY: Donna?
DONNA: It's exactly how I imagined it. And look. The sign.
KELLY: Looks like someone's moving back.
HOTEL
Naomi packs her room.
NAOMI, at phone: Okay. Yes, I know when checkout is. Thank you for reminding me again. Okay.
Naomi hangs off. Annie knocks on the door.
NAOMI: Just a minute, I'm almost done packing.
ANNIE: It's Annie.
NAOMI: What do you want?
ANNIE: Well, I-I just wanted to apologize. Um, look, I should've told you what I heard about your dad. Just chickened out. I so badly wanted to be a girl's girl, to have real friends, and I wish that I could undo what I did or…
NAOMI, opening the door: Oh! Stop. Stop! Please, I'm going to be kicked out of this hotel. I don't know where the hell I'm gonna go, and you talking on and on and on like that, it's really giving me a headache.
ANNIE: The hotel's kicking you out?
NAOMI: My dad says I have to live at home. Apparently it doesn't look good for an alleged sexual harasser would-be family man to have a 16-year-old daughter living alone in a hotel.
ANNIE: Stay at my house, as long as you want. Or, you know, until you decide what to do about your dad.
NAOMI: Live with you and your Pollyanna family? I don't know, I mean, well, I guess it'd be better than living with my dad and his mistress.
ANNIE: I would really like it.
NAOMI: Wait, why? 'Cause you pity me?
ANNIE: No.
NAOMI: Because I don't want a friendship based on pity. If we're gonna be frieto be blunt and ho We can't walk on eggs around each other.
ANNIE: Eggshells. W-We can't walk on eggshells.
NAOMI: Right. Thank you. And you play with your hair way too much. God. Sorry, you do. I mean, I'm just being honest.
ANNIE: Well, then I'm sorry that I threw the foosball game.
NAOMI: What? You let me win at… Oh, there is going to be a rematch. And I'm going to destroy you.
ANNIE: Oh, anytime. Show no pity that's my motto.
ROOM
LESLIE: Our house is big, there's a park around the corner, huge swing set, sandboxes.
GREG: A jungle gym that looks so cool, I'm tempted to climb on it.
LESLIE: Luckily, I only have to teach two days a week.
GREG: And on those days, I'll be working from home. I plan to be very hands-on. I don't want to miss a minute of this kid's life.
LESLIE: And we both want to be there for everything. You know, the smiles, the diapers, the crawling, the walking.
GREG: Building of tree houses.
LESLIE: He's been talking about this alleged tree house for years. I'll believe it when I see it.
ADRIANNA: So, it says here that you have a dog?
LESLIE: Yes, Nina. She's great with kids. We've had her seven years.
GREG: Yeah. Well, what if the baby is allergic? Oh, well, I mean, of course, we would prioritize the child.
ADRIANNA: So you'd just give your dog away after having it for seven years? My parents live sure they'd take her.
ADRIANNA: Great. Seem to have an answer for everything.
WILSONS HOUSE
Annie and Naomi then have a foosball rematch.
ANNIE: Ha! Eat it!
NAOMI: Damn it! Oh!
ANNIE: 71-70, match point. All right.
NAOMI: Ooh! 71-71. Ha! Yes!
ANNIE: Mom, can Naomi spend the night tonight?
NAOMI: Now you're gonna die.
DEBBIE: Sure. Hey, Naomi.
ANNIE: Oh! Oh, no!
NAOMI: No! No, no, no, no!
ANNIE: Oh! Oh!
KELLY’S HOUSE
KELLY: Donna, are you ready? You can't be late to your own opening. Hey. Are you okay?
DONNA: I just got off the phone with David.
KELLY: What happened?
DONNA: I told him about the space. How perfect it was, how it was exactly how I envisioned it, how I want to come back here, I want to make a go of it.
KELLY: And?
DONNA: And he said we'll have to figure out a schedule to shuttle Ruby between L.A. and Japan.
KELLY: Honey.
DONNA: I guess I always thought when push came to shove that he wouldn't want to lose me. But if he's willing to lose me…
KELLY: Oh, come here.
DONNA: I just really thought he'd want to move back here. I really did. I thought he'd choose me over Japan.
KELLY: I know this is hard, but I also know that you are amazing. You are talented and sweet and kind and wonderful, and you are gonna get through this, no matter what.
DONNA: I know. I know. I will. Part of me's really excited. I'll get to raise Ruby here, and that's what I really want. And the store is perfect. I'm really excited about signing the lease tonight. And I'm really excited to go celebrate.
KELLY: Oh, honey.
DONNA: No, I'm happy. I'm really happy.
DONNA’S PARTY
FLANAGAN: This cheese is delicious just as I foresaw.
WOMAN 1: Hey, we're gonna be sending all our friends to your store. Seriously!
DONNA: I'm counting on it!
Annie and Naomi arrive.
ANNIE: Hey, Ms. Taylor.
DONNA: Ms. Taylor?
KELLY: I know.
NAOMI: Hello, Ms.T.
KELLY: Hi, girls. Donna, this is Naomi and Annie.
DONNA: Hi. And what's with the ice pack?
NAOMI: Vicious foosball tournament.
ANNIE: I kicked her ass. And cute stuff, by the way. Maybe I'll even find a prom dress.
NAOMI: You didn't "kick" anything. She won by one point and we're definitely going to have a rematch.
Naomi gets a text from Liam.
ANNIE: Oh, you just name the day, anytime, anyplace.
DONNA: Excuse me, you guys.
NAOMI: Liam… Waa. Look at this.
Silver and Dixon arrive.
KELLY: Well, thank you both for coming. I'm sure Silver will appreciate it.
SILVER: Hey.
KELLY: Oh, hi. Honey, there you are.
Navid and Adrianna join the group.
ADRIANNA: Hey. Dixon, Silver. How you been?
SILVER: Fine. Fine.
ANNIE: Do you want something to eat?
SILVER: Uh, no, thanks.
NAOMI: Well, it feels like it's been forever. What have you been up to?
SILVER: Well, I've been reading Sense and Sensibility, actually.
NAVID: Hey, Silver, how are you? Um, can I get you something to eat? Um, some cheese?
SILVER: Um, I'm gonna get myself some cheese. Appreciate it, though.
Silver goes off to get some cheese.
NAVID: Okay, I'll help myself. Want some, hmm?
Kelly joins Silver.
KELLY: Hey, so is it nice to see everybody? Does it make you want to go back to school?
SILVER: Yep, I'm ready to go back to school.
KELLY: Honey, that's great. Good. Ooh, nice flowers.
DONNA: They're from David.
KELLY: "Thinking of you." What does that even mean?
DONNA: I guess it means he's thinking of me. But it's no plane ticket. Anyway, we're low on crackers. The foosball champs decided to inhale the whole stash and then the backup stash. So I'm gonna just gonna run around the corner and get some.
KELLY: No, no, I'll go. It's your party.
DONNA: Are you sure?
KELLY: Yes.
DONNA: Thanks.
STORE
Kelly goes to the store to pick up some snacks. Shen runs into Ryan.
RYAN: Oh, gosh.
KELLY: Hey!
RYAN: Hey. Uh late-night munchies or?
KELLY: Oh, no, a friend of mine is opening a store and ran out of crackers.
RYAN: Sure.
KELLY: What about, what about you?
RYAN: Oh, just, uh, picking up a six-pack.
KELLY: A six-pack?
RYAN: Yeah, beer is sold in packs of six. But don't worry. I'm only gonna drink three.
KELLY: Uh, well, uh, who's gonna drink the other three?
RYAN: Uh, no one's called 'em.
KELLY: I'm kinda thirsty.
PARTY
Kelly texts Donna to keep an eye on Silver while she hangs out with Ryan. Silver goes out. Ethan arrives.
ETHAN: What are you, the bouncer?
SILVER: Yeah, just keeping out the riffraff.
ETHAN: Navid texted me that everyone was hanging out. Thought I'd stop by. I actually came here with Liam, but, uh, he seems to have mysteriously disappeared.
SILVER: Oh, yeah? Well, head on in.
ETHAN: You're not gonna bounce me?
SILVER: Uh, not this time. It's fun. Everybody's here. It's Dixon, Navid, Adrianna, Naomi, Annie.
ETHAN: Ooh, two ex-girlfriends. Sounds a little claustrophobic.
SILVER: I hear ya.
ETHAN: You, uh, you mind if I sit?
SILVER: As long as you don't expect me to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
ETHAN: Thank God you're not.
Donna arrives.
DONNA: Silver?
SILVER: Yeah?
DONNA: Are you okay?
SILVER: Yeah, just, uh, just getting some fresh air.
DONNA: Okay.
***
NAOMI: Hey, Liam, I got your text. You know what? I'm not gonna be your booty call. You can't just act all cold and rude and then text me, expect me to show up and jump your bones or whatever. Got it?
LIAM: Okay, got it.
The two kiss.
***
SILVER: You want to talk about being claustrophobic? Try having people monitoring your mood every second; offering you crackers like you're an invalid.
ETHAN: At least you're being offered crackers. I got people always watching me and there's no upside.
SILVER: What do you mean?
ETHAN: Ah, I don't know. It's just you step off the path you cut one class, and people are down your throat.
SILVER: You cut class?
ETHAN: I might've. Whatever. It's not like I'm trying to be an English teacher or something. So, when are you coming back to school?
SILVER: I'm not, actually. I'm enrolling at St. Clare's.
ETHAN: You're gonna go to a Catholic school?
SILVER: It's the only place that would take me mid-semester. Went on a tour yesterday. It's not that bad.
ETHAN: Huh nah, Dixon didn't mention anything.
SILVER: Yeah, well, that's, that's because Dixon doesn't know yet. I just decided tonight. I just need a fresh start, you know? Where no one knows me where I can just be who I want to be, instead of who I was.
ETHAN: You think St. Clare's has room for me?
SILVER: It's an all-girls school.
ETHAN: Oh, sounding better and better.
KELLY’S HOUSE
Ryan and Kelly arrive, kissing each other.
RYAN: I missed you.
KELLY: I can't put on your oxygen mask.
RYAN: What is that?
KELLY: I mean, I can't commit right now.
RYAN: Agreed. No commitment. I've never felt less committed to anything wow in my entire life.
KELLY: Shut up, Ryan.
They make out.
WILSONS HOUSE
Debbie and Ryan are in the kitchen. Naomi and Annie arrive.
HARRY: Hey, how was the party?
ANNIE: It was cool.
NAOMI: Hey, so I got you guys a thank-you gift for letting me stay with you. A little birdy told me you'd miss it.
HARRY: Oh, my! Big Mouth Billy Bass! Naomi, thank you.
NAOMI: Well, Dixon sold it to me, so… Good night. Good night.
HARRY: Good night.
ANNIE: Good night.
DEBBIE: Good night. A thank-you gift? How long do you suppose Naomi is staying here?
HARRY: I don't know, but judging from the quality of the thank-you gift it could be a while.
DEBBIE: No, no!
PEACH PIT
ADRIANNA: Did you see Leslie's shoes? Kind of vain for an English professor, don't you think? I don't know how she'll carry a baby around with those shoes.
NAVID: I'm sure she has other shoes.
ADRIANNA: And didn't you think it was weird how Greg was all fixated on building that tree house?
NAVID: Look, if you didn't like them, you should have just…
ADRIANNA: I did. I did like them. I just I don't know. Just all that talking about schools and dogs and tree houses. I kept picturing the kid, you know, going to school and walking the dog and climbing in that stupid tree house. And once I pictured that kid, I just the idea of giving it up just got a lot harder.
NAVID: Hey, you don't, you don't have to give your baby up if you don't want to.
ADRIANNA: Yeah, yeah, I-I do. I've been through this. I have to be realistic. My mother doesn't have the financial means, and I'm 16. And frankly, we don't have such a great partnership, my mother and I. I don't exactly see us at baby swim classes together.
NAVID: What about us? Could you picture us?
ADRIANNA: What do you mean?
NAVID: I mean me. I mean us. I could go to baby swim classes. I mean, you're looking for a couple that communicates, right? Laughs and respects one another. I mean, that's us, right?
ADRIANNA: A baby lasts a lot longer than baby swim classes.
NAVID: Well, I'll be there a lot longer.
ADRIANNA: Yeah, until you go away to college.
NAVID: I'll go to college nearby. Who cares? Hey, hey, the only thing that matters is that I'm in love with you. I've loved you since we were seven. And I love your baby, too.
ADRIANNA: Uh I love you, too, but…
NAVID: But nothing, okay? I want to be with y… I want to be with you forever.
ADRIANNA: Come on. What do you mean? What are you saying, we should get married?
NAVID: Yes.
ADRIANNA: What?
NAVID: Yes, yes, uh what? Married, sure. Let's get married.
ADRIANNA: Really? No! No!
NAVID: We love each other, right? Why not?
ADRIANNA: Okay, yeah. Okay. Okay.
NAVID: Okay. Right?
ADRIANNA: We're getting married!
WAITER: All right, uh, two burgers medium rare.
NAVID: We're getting married. Seriously.
ADRIANNA: We're getting married.
NAVID: We're getting married!
